Some of you may not be aware but since we moved into the new flat (in March I believe it was) we have had an ongoing problem with one of the neighbouring families from the third floor. They constantly allow their 3 year old child to throw things from their back balcony.

Used tissues, food, toys, food containers, panties and even a rolling pin are just some of the items I have found in the garden that he has thrown. Despite numerous complaints to the council all they have done is sent three formal letters of complaint to the family.

Yesterday I heard a crashing sound and instinctively went to look in the garden and found that he had thrown their Sky remote control over. I went into the garden and picked it up, I then heard someone whistling at me. From the reflection in the shed window I could see it was the father.

I ignored him and made my way inside as he kept trying to grab my attention by whistling. As I opened the back door he started shouting “Oi!” repeatedly, I ignored him and closed the door. I heard him yell “Bastard!”

During the day he came to the front door around 20 times. Each time he would hammer on the door, kick the door, and buzz the buzzer, and I would pretend to be out as I sat in my room doing my work. After a couple of minutes he would slam the gate and then come back 30 minutes later.

I hope he had the TV stuck on Jeremy Kyle. 

In the evening I eventually let them have it back. I was getting my dad out of the ambulance when the mother came down and pretty much begged me for the remote control. I told her that she would have to wait until I had safely taken my dad into the flat.

I made her stand outside in the pouring rain while I watched him slowly shuffle into the flat, shuffle to his chair and then I slowly went and got her remote control from the garden where I had left it. It was covered in mud, soaking wet and had bits missing.

Sometimes life hands you little bits of fun like this, I wish I had a big fat macanudo cigar to smoke right now so I could feel like Hannibal from The A-Team.

Photo by Márcia Rodrigues from FreeImages