I was visiting the Closed Pubs website recently and was very sad to discover a few more pubs that I used to frequent have closed down. Some of them closing, although sad to see them go, was not totally unexpected as they were shitholes, but the closure of The Birdcage in Columbia Road really did shock and surprise me – how could this pub possibly be closed?

I typed the name of this well known drinking establishment into Google and found an article about it. I eagerly clicked it and soon wish I hadn’t.

The pub was closed due it almost going bankrupt. How the FUCK can you run a pub like this, in a location like it is in, into the ground? It is situated on the corner of one of the most famous markets in the world (and used to open early just to accommodate the market traders) and it did a roaring trade from the THREE estates that surrounded it.

But what really got to me was the news that the pub had been sold and was being reopened as an East London theme pub – A good old fashioned knees up at the weekend (all the old classic musical hall numbers) and traditional pie, mash and liquor on the food menu.

Why don’t you just fuck right off out of it?

You can’t recreate being a cockney no matter how much you try! You killed them off and forced them away when you ponced into the area and pumped up the prices!

I was actually so enraged that I was sorely tempted to go to this pub and start a fight with the first cunt I saw walk out of there. But judging by the amount of cunts who will be flocking to this pub to experience being a cockney I’d be there all night thumping people.

Now I know how the Irish feel. All the things they went through in their time I think having to put up with the influx of Irish theme pubs is probably the worst thing to happen to them.