The last few days have been very tough on me. In one direction I’ve got her, and her friends, causing me endless grief. In another direction I’ve got her dad piling on the guilt. In another direction I’ve got my so-called ‘friends’ who think saying ‘snap out of it’ and insulting me is going to help. And let’s not forget my loving family.
My family have spent the last two or three days telling me how stupid I am and how I’ve always been a disappointment to them. My dad is blaming me for everything that has gone wrong in his life. He blamed me for the time he got mugged and apparently he is fat because of me.
My dad is possibly the most childish person I have ever met. I have never seen another adult man throw as many tantrums as he does. Yesterday he dropped the ash from his cigar on his dressing gown, his response was to hurl the ashtray across the room.
When we row his childishness comes out. I’m not allowed into the front room to watch TV (even though I pay half of the Sky bill). He turns the internet off and bans me from using it (even though I pay half of it). He bans me from using the washing machine or using the shower that was put in for him (they pulled the bath out).
Possibly the most immature rule he comes up with is the one where I’m not allowed to close my bedroom door.
People think I’m joking or exaggerating, I wish I was then it might be funny.
The other day he scared the grand-kids because he was watching one of those channels on Sky where they just show insurance advertising, or teleshopping adverts over and over again. I asked him if I could watch something and instead of saying ‘yes’ or ‘no’ he threw the remote control on the floor and started bouncing around in his chair shouting incoherently.
I’ve been pretty much bullied into giving up football. Apparently at 31 I should not be darting off to play football I should be settled down with kids and a job that I secretly hate …. or so my family keep drumming into me. Or the classic “how can you leave your poor disabled dad on his own to play football? You are so selfish!”
It won’t be for much longer, I’m going to do something that will make everyone happy.