I Hate Halloween

It is now almost 6:30pm on a Friday night and I am sitting in my bedroom typing on a computer in pitch darkness, why? Because I am trying to give the impression that there is nobody at home because outside it is swarming with the yobs of this estate banging on doors asking for sweets, treats & cash.

For the rest of the year these kids run amok over the estate setting fire to cars, smashing windows and generally being little shites. I think I’m the only person on the estate who dares to stand up to them and for my trouble I get their mum’s threatening me, calling me a paedophile and telling me that their kids have the right to have fun.

Then come October 31st they have the nerve to put on a crappy £2 plastic mask and go to the houses of the people they have spent the past year terrorising and demand treats!

I know people will call me a miserable cantankerous git for this but it is actually a form of begging, just like when kids used to go out and murder poor Christmas carols in the hope of being rewarded with a pound or two for asking penny for the guy.

Who knows, if you stop your kid from sticking his arm into my bedroom window and nicking stuff then I might give them some sweets next year …. possibly laced with something!

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My Dog Is A Violent Thug!

Growing up in the East End of London, and running with certain people, I have seen some serious fights and attacks in my time but this morning I witnessed a savage attack that ranks possibly in the top five list.

I took my dog for a walk on the only piece of grass we are still allowed to walk dogs on and after I had let her off the leash I thought nothing of it as she belted around the grass until after about 10 seconds I noticed she was chasing something black around.

I thought it was a plastic bag but then she caught it and whatever it was started screaming. I’ve never heard a bag scream before, even when they are being taken up into the air by gusts of wind.

I soon realised it was a small black bird (I’m not sure what species it is), she was now jumping on it with her front paws and was lunging at it and biting the poor thing as it flapped and screamed in a desperate bid to escape.

I grabbed her by the collar and pulled her away as feather flew everywhere like black confetti. As I put her on the leash I looked over at the bird which was not moving, my dog as a murderer!

After taking her upstairs I popped down to go to the shop and decided to have a look and see if the bird was really dead. There was no bird so I’m assuming it was not really dead and was merely wounded and able to run/fly away to tell it’s tale of being mauled by a stupid dog.

My dog is not a murderer, but she is guilty of GBH. That is what growing up in Bethnal Green dos to you!

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I’m Starting To Hate London

I made the stupid mistake of going into work late today. This would be no bother to the manager as long as we put in the 7.5 hours a day she is happy, the mistake I made was not realising that Oxford Circus because a fucking madhouse after 5pm.

At 6pm I stroll to the station only to be stopped halfway by a packed pavement as three streams of people try to walk in three different directions. I have often wondered why people make life so difficult for not only each other but also for themselves.

I was getting pretty angry at the amount of people who were happily smashing into me and ripping my headphones from my ears as they tried to squeeze and push their way ahead of the rest of the non-moving pack.

After about ten minutes of this I ended up walking in the middle of the road just to get away from them. I noticed that they all wanted to get on the rain so I found the bus that went past my house and waited at the bus stop for it.

I was standing there watching this spectacle from across the street. Women weighed down with shopping bags were steaming into the pack, men were using their umbrellas as crowbars to try and get further into the pack.

Would it really make a difference if you had to wait another 60 seconds for your train? Would the world stop turning if you stepped back and thought “I’m not going to push and shove like some animal, I will merely wait for the next train”.

We are all going to get home in the end.

This is just another saga in the novel of my slow hatred for London.

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It’s Been A While

I have not posted a lot about my new job so I thought that I would post a quick update as I know that a lot of you are just dying to know if I have fallen on my potato-shaped face yet and lost my job.

Well the answer is no.

I have just completed a month at the job and I received my first wage in fucking years! I have not succumbed to running out and spending it all, I have actually been quite reserved and have only spent about £300 of it.

The job is going OK. To be honest I am starting to see the shine coming off and am starting to realise that being a market researcher is not really a very nice position, it is certainly not something I can envision me doing long term.

On Friday I had to take Roxy to the vet for her regular check up and worming. The vet said that apart from a swollen rectum gland she was in perfect health, he kept mentioning what great shape she was in and especially her white teeth. I’m guessing the daily dental sticks I buy from Tesco are working.

My brother came around and spent the weekend at my place. I did not mind as he bought his PS3 round and I am starting to enjoy playing the new FIFA 09 game and the Smackdown/Raw 08 game.

My dad’s new bed came Friday so we put that together and then ripped the carpet in my room out, put my new bed in and decided to move everything around. Even now at 6pm Sunday evening I am still trying to get the room sorted out.

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The Quest To See Serj Tankian (Part 2)

You can read part one by clicking here

So there I am sitting in my seat (well I say seat, it was actually a long bench about a foot off the ground with a little bit of padding) and people are slowly pouring in when I need to go to the loo. I had drunk two bottles of water before I went into the pub and two pints of beer in there. I also went to the loo in the pub twice with a full bladder on both occasions.

By the time InMe had finished their set I had been another FOUR times and then again while Serj was on stage and then again for a sixth time overall as I was about to leave the venue. Each time I had a full bladder, how does that work out?!

I put on my glasses and immediately looked at the floor as I fumbled in my pocket for my mobile phone and then started reading through my text messages, now and again looking up as if to give the impression that I had my glasses on so I could read my text messages. I noticed that nobody was paying any attention to me and slowly started to not only relax but then started not giving a shit if people saw me with my glasses on or not.

I am very self-consciousness about wearing my glasses in public, I normally only wear them when I am at home (and because of this my eyesight has suffered) so to sit in a building with about a thousand other people with my glasses on is a fucking major achievement on my part.

I’ve been a huge fan of InMe since I heard their Overgrown Eden album back in 2003/2004. Underdose is possibly still my favourite song from them.

I managed to offend an entire row of posh birds who had obviously never been to this kind of gig before because whilst everyone was on their feet and cheering like mental people, these women remained seated and were lightly tapping their hands in slight applause like they were at an opera or a play. They went downstairs after InMe’s set and never came back up.

Before InMe’s set and before Serj’s set the stage was in darkness and I could see people running around on the stage with flashlights trying to get the stage set up for the bands. Why were they doing this in the dark? Why not put the fucking lights on and do it instead of tripping over in the dark? Or better still pull the damn curtains!

To say how great Serj was would be quite impossible, I am not talented enough as a writer to be able to do him justice on page. Words such as ‘awesome’, ‘phenomenal’, ‘mind-blowing’ and even ‘electric’ should all be combined into one huge new word to even come close to describing his set.

It was the first time I have ever seen an artist smash up their equipment live on stage before and it got possibly a bigger reaction from the crowd than his songs did! At one point he smashed up his keyboard halfway through his set then had to stand there like a lemon while a tech guy fixed it because his next song was mainly a keyboard song!

When I came out of the building I got on a bus and it was not until I got halfway to Old Street that I realised I was still wearing my glasses, of course I immediately became self conscious about wearing them and took them off.

I am definitely going to more gigs, I am already looking at going to see Thunder in November and Black Stone Cherry in December. When I got home I could not sleep for hours so I went on MSN and bored everyone on my list about how great the night was.

Reiss was well annoyed that he did not go!

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Jumping A Sinking Ship

Some of you who read my blog regularly may be aware that I play non-league football for a club called AFC Ealing (AKA Acton Town). I have long since vented my spleen on the pages of this blog about my unhappiness with not only the performances the team have put in but also certain decision of the pitch.

On October 11th I played my last game for the club. It was in a humiliating 14-1 cup battering at home against a club called Clissold Park Rangers who are doing just as badly in their division as we are in ours.

As I walked off at full time I threw my shirt and armband off in a fit of disgust. Kerry picked up my armband and slipped it into my bag as I was getting changed and while walking to the local pub I dug out the armband and threw it in the River Brent.

As I sat in the pub watching the footy scores come in over a pint or two I made a decision that it was time for me to pack it all in.

People would always ask me just why I travel half way across London to play football and I would always say that the reason was because I enjoyed playing football for the club. Sadly this is no longer the case.

I hardly go to training anymore, I used to move heaven and Earth to get to them but now if something crops up I will just text Jay and tell him I’m not coming.

Almost 80% of the team have walked out, Martin looks like he is done with the club and Jayson has been fielding teams of around 7 players who do not know eachother. A small goru pof them know eachother and onl pass between themselves.

Sadly the club is dying a slow and painful death and I am jumping out before the ship goes down fully.

It has been two weeks now and although I have not said I will return I am honestly starting to miss playing football. I might have a gander and see if there is a Sunday league team looking for a slow defender.

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Giving My DVDs A Treat!

I recently received my first month’s pay from my new job and although I have resisted the urge to run out and splurg it all away I do have some plan for it and one is to buy myself a nice big home theatre system.

When I do buy this home theatre system then next thing I shall have to buy is some serious home theater seating as you can not possibly watch this kind of thing on a crappy chair or on your bed.

Although I say ’seating’ I will not be allowing anyone to watch anything on it, I just like putting my feet up and having room!

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I Have A Contract Phone

I recently bought a pay-as-you-go phone from my brother’s catalogue, I bought it before I ordered my contract phone so now I have two phones. My brother got this idea into his head that I was going to give him my contract phone (an LG Secret that is worth around £350) so he took my pay-as-you-go phone and got it unlocked for me.

I was not aware of this but apparently unlocked cell phones mean that you have invalidated any warrenty that you might have left on your phone so it might be best to wait until the warrenty has run out before unlocking your phone, if it is an expensive one.

I’m using that phone as a makeshift MP3 player at the moment as I think my LG Secret blows it away (the pay-as-you-go phone is a Sony Ericsson w380i.

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I Might Have To Make Friends With My Neighbour!

I was looking out of my front room window today, because I’m nosey, when I noticed that one of my neighbours on the ground floor (the one right underneath us) has recently purchased some of the coolest garden furniture I’ve seen.

He likes to hold garden parties. Not the kind you would see the royal family going to, these are attended by people who like to eat BBQ food and drink beer out of cans. The kind of thing I’d atten if e knew eachother.

The outdoor furniture covers that he has are very funky as well, they are white wih red streaks racing through it.

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I Need To Buy A Laundry Hamper

I am a very messy person. If you look at my bedroom floor it is awash with dirty clothes, I like to play a game called find a piece of carpet! I’m not a dirty person, I’m just incredibly messy and will throw my clothes anywhere

Something that I need to sort out is getting myself a laundry hamper, but to be honest I am not sure if that will stop me as I am so used to throwing my clothes on the floor.

Popularity: 8% [?]

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