It was quite a weekend for me, seeing as my dad is in hospital having his annual bath I decided to blow most of my money on four days of drinking with a game of football thrown in for good measure.

I spent most of Thursday and Friday scrubbing the place from top to bottom, I do this when he goes into hospital otherwise he will follow me around the house telling me what I am allowed and not allowed to clean and I will get so annoyed that I have to fight the urge not to twat him over the head with the hoover!

Thursday I stayed in and attempted to drink my own weight in beer whilst listening to the excellent RockWorld music channel. I have found myself listening to this music channel more and more recently, I have discovered the awesome RockJaw show, not only is it informative but it is also very funny. The female presenter reminds me a lot of Jenna.

On Friday I was supposed to be meeting up with a few people who I have not seen in years, they were people I used to drink in Abbey Cemetery with (how classy am I!?), but for some reason it did not happen and I went out with Reiss instead.

We went up Angel (lovely girl that Angel) and had a bit of a pub crawl, starting in The Camden Head and ending up at The Mucky Pup. It was a nice evening. Reiss got talking to some girl, about the ghost in the pub, and apparently it was my fault that he did not get off with her – how dare I sit there not talking and keeping myself to myself …. HOW BLOODY DARE I!

We got the bus to Hackney and I wanted to walk the rest of the way home but for some reason Reiss was so desperate for me to get on the bus with him that he paid my fare. I had money, I just wanted to walk home and get myself a bit sobered up for the football match that I had the following afternoon.

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I was quite pleased with the way I played in the game, we beat FC Riverside (AKA Freezywater) thanks to my runs and my workouts I am finding that I am a lot fitter than I have been over the previous seasons, this is clear by the fact that I am not as knackered after the games.

I was pretty pissed off that they brought everyone’s bags up but left only mine behind, I was busy putting the nets up so I thought that someone would have brought it up but it was left next to the table for over 2 hours. How nobody stole it I will never know as we were on the other side of the park.

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Saturday night was another small pub crawl with Reiss, we again started at The Camden Head and ended up at The Mucky Pup. We were invited to meet up with Jenna and Yvonne at a pub called The Compton but Reiss fell in love with a Polish barmaid at a pub called The King’s Head so we ended up staying there for about four pints.

I actually spent most of the time outside the pub in the drissle because it was so fucking hot in the pub. It was so hot that even Reiss said it was “a bit warm”. I had my new coat on so I was nice and dry, whilst Reiss got wet, Hurrah!

In The Mucky Pup Reiss introduced me to a new drink which literally took my breath away. I’ll certainly be trying that again.

Reiss lost his Oyster card on the way home and he got the hump and ran off up the road, I did not know where he went, I was standing in the rain looking for him, but then I went home after deciding that he as big enough and ugly enough to look after himself … and I was starving.

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On Sunday I had a very lazy day and invited my mate Paul round for a drink or 20. We got drunk and listened to Scuzz and RockWorld. Thus ending my fantastic long weekend of drinking.

I received a “friendly warning” from the council about my dog today. Basically when Reiss comes to my door he will stand and look in my bedroom window in order to wind up my dog and she goes into a barking frenzy.

Somebody has made a complaint about the barking that she does so Reiss, I know you read this, STOP WINDING MY DOG UP, YOU BASTARD!

Training was OK on Saturday. Kerry (the club secretary & Jayson’s girlfriend) has got a bit of an attitude with me lately for some reason, I’m not sure why but I am putting it down to her being on the blob – because I like fulfilling that stereotype that when a woman acts odd then she is on her period.

When we played South Acton two weeks ago I got annoyed at the way we were letting them fuck us up the arse (I love that terminology in football) and got changed, I asked her if she knew where the kitbag was and she just turned her back on me and said something like “I don’t care”.

When she asked me where I was going, and I said I was going home, she said “Bye then” in a really sarcastic tone.

When I went to training on Saturday she made numerous references to me looking like a tramp and about my hair, she actually had the gall to say that with her hair that looked like it had not been washed in months.

When it looks like it will rain I always bring white bin bags with me, this is for me to put my stuff in to keep everything nice and dry. This was something that I learned when I used to go camping as a child. Kerry again made references to me being a tramp.

When we were having a training match near the end I got a drink from my bag and plonked my bag with all the other bags. As I walked away Kerry said “I don’t know why you’re leaving your bag there for, I’m not looking after it”. All I could say was “I did not ask you to”.

After training everyone took refuge under a clump of trees whilst we got changed out of the rain, I took one of my bin bags out and used it to stand on so my feet and socks would not get soaked. Kerry sidled up to me and asked if she could use that bin bag to put on her head to keep the rain off.

I almost told her to fuck off but I just picked it up and gave it to her.

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The recent floods have left hundreds of thousands of people homeless, what angered me was just how many of them had not bothered to insure their homes and are now actually demanding that the Government pay for the damage to their homes.

If you can not be bothered to take the time to insure your home then you deserve everything that you get!

Wayne says that I have the worst possible luck when it comes to using services from companies. I’ve had Sky charge me double month after month, I’ve had British Telecom disconnect me despite paying the bill, I’ve had my bank randomly charge me for direct debits that do not exist.

A couple of weeks ago I had my phone line disconnected and my broadband stopped (both are with British Telecom). I got Wayne to phone them up for me, otherwise I would have been screaming, shouting and swearing at them, and they told him that someone told them that I did not want their services anymore and that is why they stopped my services and sent me a bill for £502 (since increased to £658).

When Wayne phoned British Telecom they apologised and said they would reconnect my line on Friday but this did not happen so he phoned them again on this morning and was told that the person he spoke to must have forgotten to set it up. So they said they would reconnect me later on today but this has not happened either so Wayne will phone them up tomorrow for a third time.

Maybe he has a point; maybe I do have bad luck when it comes to using services…

Yesterday Acton Town had their first pre-season match against one of our many rivals, South Acton. I played about 70 minutes before I was subbed in order to give Clarkey a run out. I sat on the touchline and watched for about ten minutes before I got pissed off with the poor display and went home, we were losing 2-1 at this point.
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After two weeks doing my little workout, to try and lose a bit of weight and sort my wrist out, I tried to up the weight from 15lbs to 20lbs but my wrist started hurting really badly so I decided to just increase the amount of reps I did instead.

I increased each set from 20 to 25, I have to do this slowly as I do not want to injure my wrist like I did when I re-tore my hamstring by trying to do to much too soon when I injured it a couple of seasons ago.

I’ll keep this for another two weeks then either try and increase the weight or increase the reps depending on how my wrist feels.

I added a new workout; I’m hoping to do this every now and again. I’m not sure of the proper name for it but you lift the barbell over your head but you bring it down behind your head to shoulder height and then lift again. It is a killer!

I have also started running again. I’m going to start running Monday, Wednesday & Friday for a couple of miles each time just to see how it goes, but knowing how much I love running I’ll probably increase the length way before I should.

I should really follow my running training guide that I wrote in school then I might be able to give it a bit of credibility when I decide to put it into book form as many people have suggested I should.

So my new workout is now:

25 Barbell curls (Repeat 5 times)
20 Sit-ups (Repeat 5 times)
25 Bench presses (Repeat 5 times)